I knew I should have paid more attention in Spanish class. As I causally conjugated verbs and learned the tenses, I knew that there would be a real world situation that I wouldn’t be prepared and would regret not taking class more seriously.

That was of course before I got an iPhone.

This morning when I got the gym, I realized that I had unintentionally left my pad lock hanging on the locker door yesterday. I had already packed all my stuff into one of the premium lockers you only get if you arrive at the gym before 6:30 and there was a small Jewish man eyeing me to see if I was coming or going. I didn’t have a lock to put on my door, so I was just about to roll the dice and leave it unlocked when I saw the janitor come around the corner to collect the used towels.

“Excuse me. I left my lock here yesterday, do you have a lost and found?”

“I don’t…”

“Or maybe down at the front desk?”

“I don’t… I don’t speak english.”

All of a sudden my Tuesdays and Thursday zoning out during Churros y Chocolate II in high school came rushing back to me and slapped me upside the head. “I should have paid attention!” I thought to myself. “How do I say ‘padlock’ in Spanish?” Grrr, very frustrating.

Not wanting to leave my things unattended for any longer than I had to, I went back to see that the little man had stopped staring at my locker and had found a premium one of his very own. I didn’t want to leave my locker unlocked, it had my laptop bag, my wallet, my iPhone…

My iPhone! I flipped through my 5 pages of Apps to my back page (the page were Apps go to die) and found the “Free Translator Lite” App smiling up at me. I quickly pecked in “I lost my lock. Do you have a lost and found?” and it spit back “He perdido mi cerradura. Tiene usted un perdido y encontrado?” To ensure that I didn’t butcher the pronunciation, I tracked down the janitor and held up my phone to him. He looked down and then looked back up at me and raised his hand in the air, one finger raised.

“Ah-ha!” (Translates well in English and Spanish)

He walked me over to a closet, smiled as he enter, and when he emerged, had my lock in hand.

The moral of the story? Sometimes it isn’t always about working harder when you can work smarter. Especially when you have an iPhone.Tweet

I got a new sport coat this week. I am a fan. Blue wool with a faint white pin stripe. Soft shoulders and an athletic fit. Rocking it with jeans, a button down shirt, my paisley pocket square, and my cowboy boots made me smile when I caught a glimpse in the mirror, it is everything I hoped it would be when I left the store in SoHo.

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As boarding group two had completed their boarding and the gate agent was about to allow group three to approach the podium, her phone rang. Shortly there after all of us still waiting to board learned that our pilot needed a new plane and a swap needed to occur.Instantly a line formed and began to snake through the gate area and into the LAX lobby. Though our flight is only delay 50 minutes total, apparently half the flight was making a connecting the moment our plane landed. As a content traveler, I didn’t feel the need to hope in line, but got a good seat for all the drama, action, and comedy that is even now unfolding.
A couple in their early thirties provided my biggest smile of the morning. They walked up to the very front of the line, past the 50+ waiting passengers and stood next to the front of the queue. With a false innocence that I saw them rehearsing as they walked up, they attempted to lure a gate agent’s eyes their direction. Quickly noticing what was about to happen, a slick haired, pin stripe suited, blue tooth wearing first class flier nudged his similarly dressed neighbor in line. “The line starts back there,” the second executive sternly said to the not so innocent couple. Still trying to get their way, the younger man looked back with as much sincerity and naivety and asked, “oh, are you in line?” I braced myself for a chorus of 50 voices strong barking out “YES!” but the silence and dagger eyes said it all to clearly.
I smiled as I watched a whole new definition of “the walk of shame” unfold before my eyes. Ouch.Tweet

Taking the bait and listening to the results of a poll I took and all that voted (Thanks Cristie,) I finally gave in to the fad and wrote my “25 Random Things about Me” (with my own over achiever twist.)

1. As I write, it is my birthday in London.
2. Finger food could sustain me for the rest of my life.
3. I do not use shaving cream, never have.
4. Will Smith is the celebrity that I am most frequently mistaken for.
5. I have a man crush on Josh Hamilton.
6. I got bored and taught myself to play guitar my senior year in high school.
7. My golf clubs were made in the 1960s
8. Pocket squares are my most recent fashion indulgence. Fanny packs are next.
9. Artificial cherry is one of only three flavors I dislike.
10. I am by far the most humble person I know.
11. My favorite book is a book of fiction. Other than that one, I only read nonfiction.
12. DVR has changed my life and made me a better human being.
13. I have unnaturally impressive flexibility and balance for a tall guy.
14. My cologne was discontinued. This makes Annie sad.
15. I bleed maroon.
16. I intend to have visited all 7 continents by the time I am thirty. 3 down, 4 to go.
17. My favorite painting is by a French artist. My favorite book is by a Brazilian author. My favorite song is about a small town boy born and raised in South Detroit.
18. I have been told I have the dance moves of a black man.
19. I have never seen a Korean Elvis in person.
20. I hate cheese pizza and vanilla ice cream due to their sheer lack of flavor.
21. I have read the entire Bible, verse by verse.
22. I am seven inches taller than my Dad.
23. I have kept a journal since 1997.
24. Rosemary is my favorite spice.
25. My favorite words are legendary and swagger.
26. I read the rules to understand how far I can push the envelope.
27. I am the luckiest guy in the world and have some of the greatest friends, most incredible family, and the love of my life Annie to thank for that.
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A note from my Uncle Herb referencing the post Sober Hope below:
“After reading the comments of your friend Skinner, I also received this. I thought it not only melded well with his comments, but also said a lot from the military. I have a buddy who is currently doing a National Guard tour as an Instructor at the Command and Staff College at Ft. Leavenworth. The video in the link was used on the day after the Inauguration at both the Army War College and the Staff and Command College to help the senior Army officers adjust to the new Commander in Chief…”

Classification: UNCLASSIFIED Caveats: NONE
“Yea we have real change! This Jon Stewart video was used at the Army War College yesterday as a CE for discussion on strategic leadership. …”
‘
Changefest 2009 – Obama’s Inaugural AddressTweet

The top 5 reason I have waited until tomorrow, 12/23, to begin my Christmas shopping:
1. Everyone has already told you what they are getting everyone else, so you can make sure you don’t duplicate
2. Stores are getting more creative on how to make sure they don’t declare bankruptcy on January 2nd due to low December sales.
3. Parking spaces are easier to find.
4. It is more of a green friendly move to just do it all in one car trip. Merry Christmas mother earth.
5. I am a man and doing my best to be the stereotype this year.Tweet

Is it a sign that a man is gay if he has a pink metallic phone? That is the broad sweeping stereotype that I feel prey to at the downstairs hotel bar in the W at Lexington and 50th this evening.

Annie and I had an amazing evening to cap off a memorable day in the city and were making one last stop before heading to Uptown. As we were paying the bill Annie asked me if I saw her cell phone in the booth where we were sitting. This is not the first time that Annie’s phone has disappeared for no apparent reason, so I whipped out my blackberry and call her number (I have done this a couple times before) so we could hear where it was, but instead of hearing it ring in Annie’s purse I hear:

*”Hello…wait, this is not your phone?” CLICK

At which point we realize that Annie’s phone is somewhere else in Manhattan. So I call again:

*”Hello, Andy?” (He read the caller ID)

“Hi, this is Andy.”

*”Hi, who are you.”

“I am the owner of the phone that you are speaking on.”

*”We’ll we found it, but the bigger question is, what the hell are you doing with a pink phone?”

“It is…”

*”Never mind that, we’ll deal with that later. Where are you?”

From this point we proceed to figure out where the phone is and how to make the swap. Annie and I caught the next 6 train to Midtown and made our way to the W Hotel on Lexington. There we meet Chris and Caroline, the rescuers of the phone. We had a great laugh about his accusation that me having a pink metallic phone was a sign of my sexual preference. Caroline had yelled at him for being insensitive and potentially offensive for assuming that a man with a pink phone was interested in other men.

All in all it was a successful, though not politically correct at times, story of strangers helping strangers in the heart of the city, pink metallic phone and all.Tweet

Family resemblance? I think so.
Photo credit: Uncle HerbTweet

Due to the fantastic fashion sense and poise that Annie has, it was no surprise to me when I was walking through the airport this weekend and saw her face on the cover of Vogue! The article inside details out her picks for the season and the trends that she has seen on her travels that she believes will make their way to America in the coming year…… Okay, well, not really. But Photofunia.com does give you some really fun ways to manipulate and snaz up your profile picture! Enjoy!Tweet

Hands free headsets for your cell phone are very useful and practical most of the time. When you are driving or maybe while sitting at your computer, a life saver. But, when you are sitting in an airport, walking through a 7-11, or eat dinner with your family; you having a blue tooth head sheet in your ears is ridiculous. You are not that important. There is not a call you are expecting that could possibly carry that level of significance for you to need to have a plastic ear piece stuck to the side of your head. There is really no good time that i can think of to be walking a round in public, especially a bar (i just want to mock those guys to their face), that would warrant you being that in tune with your phone. If your phone starts ringing and you have to fish around in your pocket for the ear piece, just to answer the phone, you addiction is severe. If you family members and friends do not start speaking to you until they have seen the left side of your head (to ensure you aren’t saving the world with your plusating blue light head piece), you need to acknowledge your issue and seek help.

In fact, the new way to show that you’ve made it, is to not carry a blackberry or iPhone at all. You know you have arrived when your underlings are trying to convince you to leave it at home and let them handle it. Just look at the most powerful man in the world, he can’t give it up, but he is going to have to soon.

There is a big wonderful world going on around you. Unplug, untooth, and live in the moment.

Sent via BlackBerry from T-MobileTweet